I often hear or read remarks along the lines of “I would love to wear that, but I’m far too fat to look good in lolita” or “Isn’t goth just for skinny waifs? I wouldn’t fit in” or “I’m too old to wear such colorful clothes!” or any variation citing one’s body as a reason to not participate in a subculture or creative fashion. These excuses all come down to fear- fear of being ridiculed, of rejection, of possibility- what a waste to spend a life wishing you’d experimented more, expressed yourself more fully!
Subculture fashion began as a rebellion against the expected, the mainstream- hence counter culture. And what’s more “expected” than adhering the completely made up concepts of age-appropriate apparel and putting everyone over size 8 in a matronly tent? Embracing your creativity and enjoying the unique styles you love and wearing them at *all* sizes and ages is an act of rebellion.
There’s a true rebellion in being visible and unique when your body is not “society’s current ideal” (and let’s not even begin about how society’s ideal keeps changing anyway). It’s a triumphant middle finger raised to the lie of the “ideal”, it’s a celebration of yourself and your creativity! It helps encourage acceptance of alternative cultures/styles and makes the world a more colorful and magical place.
When you embrace yourself and allow your creativity to the surface I believe it breeds a special sort of confidence and joy. Confidence is naturally attractive to others and acts as a buoying force as you go about your day. I always feel 10,000 times better dressed “up” in my favorite (weird) clothes than I ever do in casual “acceptable” attire. Even though I am not anywhere near society’s “ideal”, even though I’m fat and not exactly a kid- I dress up for me alone and the act is transformative.
So the next time you feel worried about pursuing a unique style remember that the way to rock it best is to fake a “no f*cks” attitude until it’s real! Put on your frills, spikes, whatever and just remember you are walking the same route of rebellion and social change as those subcultures did before you and take pride in your awesome creative self. 🙂 Okay? Okay.