I’m fancy! I dress up whenever I can, which means if I am running errands or even just going to the bank I am dressed up. I love vintage hats and have an eclectic wardrobe of vintage and handmade pieces. Clothing inspires me, challenging myself to coordinate things to express what I am interested in visually as often as possible keeps my creativity bright and lends me a sort of energy, I think.
One thing people often ask me in person is if my appearance garners negative reactions from strangers. Do people make rude comments or treat me badly because I dress exuberantly? To this I’d have to say no. Mostly I am just asked “what is the occasion” to which I reply, “I could be hit by a bus today, I wouldn’t want to die in clothes I don’t love or be mad I didn’t wear this hat before I died”. I do get a large number of granny-aged ladies stopping me to tell me about the hats they used to have or remarking on my petticoats…Which is charming and kind.
There are the rare people who stare (which I don’t even notice now) or teenagers who sneer (but that is because most teens can be very insecure and they look for just about any reason to sneer at just about anyone, on those occasions I am glad it’s me and not someone who’d be upset by such crap). Every alternatively-attired person has a couple horror stories about being treated poorly for looking different, but the more you dress up and respond positively to people who are curious about it, the more accepting (or numb) the world become to it.
Sometimes I get letters from young people asking variations of how to deal with peoples’ reactions to their creative attire, some are even afraid to dress the way they’d like to because they are scared of being treated poorly in their ensembles. That makes me so sad! The world can definitely be an ugly mean place- but don’t give up on something you love because others don’t get it. Let their fear-inflated opinions roll off of you. They are just jealous that you’ve broken out of the typical when they won’t allow themselves, they want to knock you down because you are unique- and that’s pitiful. If you are true to what you love and passionate about it that energy attracts like-minded people! Surround yourself in positive people who inspire you and forget the rest of the world, they aren’t important.
“I don’t care what you think about me, I don’t think about you at all!” (Coco Chanel)
When I get dressed my approach is, “what would I think if I saw someone dressed like this on the street?”- and if the answer isn’t “excited!” or “enthralled!” then it’s not right. Never strive to impress people who are determined to not understand you, that’s a losing battle.
So go be amazing today! 😀
-Taeden
Gloomth & the Cult of Melancholy 
You go, Taeden! You’ve got styles for miles.
Heh, thanks! 😛
Reminds me of the article with Dita Von Teese about style:
“I recall a moment I had once that really cured me of feeling self-conscious. Two guys made fun of me in passing, who were both dressed in hideously ugly, stained and torn “University of Idiocy” T-shirts with mismatched shorts and some sort of offensive footwear.
I remember thinking, “Wait a minute, the fact that THESE guys think I look silly/crazy/unsexy is actually a compliment!””
http://www.xojane.com/fashion/dita-von-teese-clothing-advice-xojane?utm_medium=facebook
Yes, exactly!!!! She is also the one who had that brilliant quote about the peaches!
“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches!”
Awesome! I wish more people dressed up!!! I think it’s why I enjoy watching period pieces for movies so much…. Thanks for the inspiration!
Thank you! 🙂
Yes, if everyone who wanted to dress up DID then the world would be a much more beautiful place!
I read this article and loved it for its realistic but optimistic outlook to life. Tis a shame some people will never see different as interesting, even when as beautiful as some of your outfits. Love the pictures, those people who have the privilege of see you are the lucky ones.
Taeden, you are amazing ❤
Thank you for your kind words! 😀
This is something that I still struggle with daily. As a university student on a very “hick” campus I’m sometimes afraid to wear my nice things because I really don’t know if I’ll be physically harassed or not. That, and there’s the added perk of rising crime in my neighborhood. I frankly don’t want to be a target and it makes me sad that dressing up in my favorite finery could paint me as one.
That is really sad to hear! :(! Do people physically harass people on your campus for their appearance? That’s awful!
I live close to a conservative Christian university, and although I am not a student I have had students call me a Satanist for dressing in alternative fashion, even though I personally try to keep my necklines and hemlines at a modest level. I do consider myself to be a Christian, I just like alternative fashion and people think it’s a sin to wear it because it’s dark.
I don’t remember there being fashion guidelines in the Bible, heh.
Ugh that is super frustrating!
Love your post! Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us 🙂 I feel the same way, and try to dress in my version of “fancy” whenever I can 🙂
Thank you! 🙂 Im thrilled you appreciate the post! I think it’s important to love the way you dress yourself!
Reblogged this on I Can't Stop Raving.